Sometimes, It Just Takes ONE Conversation to Change Your Life!

I was thinking this morning about the importance of the profession that I am in. Besides doing various trainings, workshops and consulting, I also coach people. Coaching is a profession that continues to develop but it originally came out of the self help industry. Many of the first coaches were publicists, consultants, sales professionals, and financial advisors. Much of what these people loved about what they did was helping people figure out how to achieve their best.

My own career was in full swing when I was a celebrity lecture agent. Without knowing it, and calling it mentoring, I was coaching college students all over the country in their future careers, their dating lives, or what to do for their summer break. I got really great at asking questions and giving accurate feedback about what I was hearing. I enjoyed pushing people to the next level and enjoyed helping them see that they already HAD the talent they needed to achieve their goals. Now, they just needed a plan.

Years later I see how it sometimes just takes ONE conversation to really turn a person's life around. And I truly believe that everyone should take the time to find someone to engage with in this conversation.

This is a typical conversation that I have with a first time client. "I'm not satisfied with my job. There's no creativity or I'm just not that into it. I want to try something new but I don't know what." Or, "there are so many things I like to do that I can't just seem to focus on one".

Here is how two of the conversations went recently:

I went to lunch with a young woman who has one child who is about to go to school. She had a successful corporate career but has no desire to go back to corporate America. She has so many things she enjoyed so I asked her to make a list of the things she really loved to do:

The list included:
Singing
Working with teenagers
Administrative work
Promotional work
Writing
Organizing

So, I went through the list and crossed off the ones that weren't going to bring her the income she needed and that she can do for fun at church. (Singing and working with teens). Next, I combined the rest of them and asked if she had ever considered running a professional organizers business?

The look in her eyes was definitely worth gold! She lit up like a Christmas tree because she had never thought of that before. And all we did was combine her talents into one job title.

Now, a few weeks later, she's busy reading everything she can get her hands on and starting to make plans to promote her business. She's told me that she'll be doing lots of free organizing jobs to get referrals in the beginning so she agreed to put me on that list! Its' not going to happen overnight, but with baby steps every day, she'll gain experience, confidence, and hopefully, clients!

Another conversation that took place recently was a life changing one for a guy who lived on my street. Steve has two kids and a wife who had been at home with their kids since they were born. His wife, Anne, was a nurse and he was a computer programer. Over time, the type of programming he did was phased out. Somehow, he didn't see that coming and never got trained on anything else.

When I last saw him at the pool, I knew he had just lost his job. He was trying to decide what else to do. So, I asked him the all important question:

"If you could do anything else in the world, what would it be?"

Steve admitted that he would love to be creative on the computer by doing graphic art but he had no idea where to start and besides he felt it was too late to build a career on a dream. We brainstormed about how to get started from taking classes to doing some volunteer or freebie projects on the side to learn the basics.

I knew also that his wife had "Had it up to Here" with his lack of motivation and knew that she was facing going back to work full time as a nurse. As it turned out, that is exactly what she did, until Steve realized that he could in fact, plan for his dream.

Recently, a For Sale Sign went up and they moved to Florida. Steve is going back to school to learn Graphic Design, and Anne is going to work until he gets his degree.

I know of no better way to make someone's day than to push them in the directions of their dreams. Even when someone's dreams are out of the ordinary or so far fetched that you can't imagine it yourself, it's still a wonderful gift to help someone figure out HOW to do it, or at least encourage them to try.

Everyone has dreams. But not everyone is pursuing them. If you are one of the lucky ones who is, then what are you doing to help other people pursue their dreams? And if you AREN'T pursuing your dreams, then realize that you won't be really content until you are moving in that direction.

I have a bracelet that has a wonderful quote on it. I wear it when I need some extra motivation. It says:Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.Thoreau, Henry David

Who knew that life could be made more simple, with only one conversation!

My advice? GET TALKING!

COMMENTS FROM FRIENDS:
Hi Mary------that was the best blog I have ever read!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You do absolutely have a very unique gift-of helping people to find their gift and the how to,s of setting people on the path towards that goal. E. M, Florida

To learn more about Mary go to: http://www.marygardner.com/

Mary Gardner is an Executive Communications Consultant and Coach. She works with, coaches and trains individuals, sales teams, executives, and celebrities. She enjoys seeing the best come out in people and has fun in the process. Mary is married to Sway and is mommy to Jeremy 5 and lives in Orlando, FL.

More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Coaching Information:

Related Articles

Eureka! I've Found It!
OK, so it wasn't quite that big of a deal. But I did find the "T" that mysteriously escaped from the word "not" in one of my articles a few months ago.
Coaching: YOU Can Improve Your Organizations Performance
GOOD BUSINESS COACHING: Clearly, the right kind of coaching can alter a team's or an organization's performance. The implication for business is that if you create a climate of coaching in any organization, you can produce performance that exceeds your expectations - and you won't have to change the people to do so.
Communicating Anger Compassionately
Whether it is irritability or unmitigated rage, anger is an emotion everyone knows about. Unfortunately, few people have been taught how to mange this feeling in an assertive and compassionate way.
Whats Wrong with Life Coaching?
As a Life Coach I quickly identified most individuals wanted to achieve a particular goal or ambition and tried it themselves without success, and unfortunatley were still reluctant to get any help. So, I started 'A Life Coaching' a company which provides individuals with the tools, skills and processes to Life Coach themselves.
Live With An Attitude Of Gratitude
Imagine for a moment one of those nights when you just can't fall asleep and you have to get up early the next morning for a very important meeting of which you are the keynote speaker. Your alarm clock goes off early in the morning waking you from what little sleep you had.
Business Coaching Legacy: Reflections on What You Want to Leave Behind?
Updating my will has been on my mind for quite some time now. Life circumstances change, kids grow-up, financial situations changes.
Plug in Your Systems for Success
Have you ever noticed that so many of us who work diligently and ethically rarely achieve our objectives? And, why is it that those who-seemingly-work half as hard and half as long experience one success after another?The answer is twofold; successful people succeed because they implement proven, systems for success. Secondly, successful people have mastered the art of making time, work for them.
Addiction to Blame
Allen consulted with me because his wife of 18 years had threatened to leave him if he didn't stop blaming her all the time. He admitted to frequently blaming her in a variety of situations.
Media Underload! The Stress Reducing Psych-Diet
The war, taxes, the economy, increased health problems, crime on the rise, overwhelming divorce rate, corruption in corporate America, and, oh yes, Janet at the Super Bowl! Where does it end? With so much going wrong, whats going right in the world?It is times like these that I find myself mired down in the muck spewing forth from every media outlet. Like water dripping on a sponge, this negativity begins to seep in and pervade my thoughts and influence my reactions to the world around me.
Walt Disney, the Inspiration to Form a Better Life?
You, like many others, may have come to this article because you want more from life. In this sense, you and I may be alike because we're searching for greater happiness and a stronger sense of fulfillment.
Miscommunication - Root Cause of Problems?
People of two opposing ideas can stir up argumentsand fights. It's that situation when one thinkshe has the right concept while the other one also believes he has the proper notion.
Your Personal Treasure Chest
Sometimes it is helpful to review several of the basic components of THE ENCHANTED SELF. That's what I've decided to do this time.
How to Jump-start Your Emotional Health
You've probably heard the expression: "It's not what you're eating. It's what's eating you!" This well-known saying reminds us that the thoughts we entertain can have an impact on our health.
The Best Things in Life Are Rarely Things
Have you ever noticed this to be true?The best things in life for me are those things are not things at all. People and experiences make the biggest mark: a wonderful relationship, time with family, or a fantastic vacation that stays in my mind for years.
Key Questions for a Coaching Conversation
There are 2 key skills that coaches need to be truly effective, the ability to listen (often for what is missing rather than what is said) and the ability to ask the right question at the right time.Now in reality there are no 'right' questions, there are however some very good, and fairly generic questions that when asked which can make a significant difference to the way in which a coaching interaction progresses.
A Fresh Look at the Choices We Make
We are frequently held back from making future plans or reaching goals based on the perceived wrongness of choices we've made in the past. I want to give you something to think about.
How To Improve Your Selling Skills -- With Coaching Skills
But people love being coached. It's respectful and considerate of their needs.
Are You Worth Investing In?
Do you realise that if you're green you're growing and if you're ripe you're rotten? So says Winston Marsh, Business Marketing Guru in his recent newsletter.Here's an excerpt from it .
Mentors and Coaches: How to Find a Great Mentor
A career coach or mentor is a person who can guide you with the benefit of their experience. He or she may be someone more senior from within your organisation or someone external to your organisation who has been successful in the field or skills you want to develop.
How to Make $100,000 Dollars as a Personal Trainer - Part C for Client!
My name is Greg Ryan. For the last twenty years I have counseled thousands of personal trainers, fitness directors and gym owners on how be successful in the health and fitness industry.