A Small Piece Of Carpet

Have you ever noticed how the way you feel about yourself sometimes depends on whether or not you get confirmation of your value from others? When you enter into challenging situations with a positive self identity you will discover that you are living your life with a greater sense of enjoyment and fulfillment.

I have learned a lot about nurturing a positive identity of love and appreciation from the man who taught me to train dogs. Dogs and humans both have a "self identity" that determines perception of the world, behavior, and one's sense of self worth. Let me explain how my teacher nurtured a positive self identity in the dogs he trained.

Frank had a very fascinating way of helping the guard dogs he trained, to feel respected, protected and loved, regardless of the situation/context they were in. Here is how he accomplished this. First of course, he started out by treating his dogs with love and respect, and by showing them an infinite amount of patience as they were learning. This of course is crucial.

Then, the next thing he did was a true stroke of genius. He would cut a small piece of carpet for each dog he trained. He would place the carpet in the dog's sleeping area, for him to lie on each night. He would also take this carpet during the day and set it down in various locations, and sit the dog on the carpet, as he praised the dog for being good. Whenever he moved to a new location, he would have the dog stand up, and he would pick up the carpet and carry it to the new location, set it down, sit the dog down, and again, praise the dog for being a "good boy." Soon the piece of carpet took on the distinct odor of the dog, and Frank said that this led the dog to feel "at home" when sitting on the carpet.

Next, Frank would teach the dog to pick up the piece of carpet himself, and carry it to wherever they were going. The dog would then set the piece of carpet down when they stopped, and sit on top of it, with Frank all of the time praising him for being a good dog. Now Frank said, "The dog begins to feel that he truly belongs in every place that he travels to, and no matter where he goes, he receives my love and appreciation. Soon the dog takes on this love and appreciation as the primary core of his identity."

And I ask you now, if this strategy works so brilliantly with dogs, would the same basic strategy not work just as well with human beings? Ask youself, "What is the small piece of carpet you carry around with you wherever you go?" "Would your life not be very different if you changed your piece of carpet to one of self love and appreciation?"

About The Author

Charlie Badenhop is the originator of Seishindo, an Aikido instructor, NLP trainer, and Ericksonian Hypnotherapist. Benefit from his thought-provoking ideas and a new self-help Practice every two weeks, by subscribing to his complimentary newsletter "Pure Heart, Simple Mind" at http://www.seishindo.org/anger/index.html.

More Resources

Unable to open RSS Feed $XMLfilename with error HTTP ERROR: 404, exiting

More Coaching Information:

Related Articles

A Quick Checklist for Improving Your Life
1. Learn About YouIf you don't know who you are and why you think and act the way you do, it's gonna be really difficult to make any positive changes in your life.
Business Coaching - Ten Ways of Dealing with Mistakes You Made
You can either choose to dwell on what happened and get stuck in the past or you can choose to start using your energy to build your future. Either choice is okay.
101 Winning Choices
Personal missions statements (PMS) are just nothing but the winning choices. Our mind can program us in such a way that success ratio in personal, social & professional life changes drastically.
Fear Is Nothing To Be Afraid Of!
What do you do when fear shows up? Do you hide under the covers of life, shivering as you anxiously wait for the moment to pass or do you stand up with a confident smile and embrace it?Your answer to this simple question will have a considerable impact on the level of freedom, excitement and empowerment you experience on a daily basis. Whatever your response, the thing to remember is that your fears are nothing to be afraid of!What is Fear?The Oxford dictionary defines fear as "an unpleasant emotion caused by the expectation of pain".
Smelling the Roses: Better Living Through Savoring
"Stop and smell the roses," people often say. Then they smile ruefully, because everybody knows there isn't enough TIME to stop or, as my daughter says, to "chill.
How to Deal Effectively with Anxiety
Every human feels anxiety on occasion; it is a part of life. All of us know what it is like to feel worry, nervousness, fear, and concern.
Business Career, Executive, Life Coaching Article Mechanisms of the Mind (Achieving Success)
Suppose that the human mind is nothing more than a bio-computer and that the function of this computer is to get its owner exactly what he says he wants..
Becoming An Information Filter And A Knowledge Sponge
As the title states, "Become an Information Filter and a Knowledge Sponge." On your daily journey to achieve your WHY, you will travel through many different avenues and sometimes you will ask yourself, "Why do I need to meet this person or experience this situation?" The key is to truly understand that you must become an information filter and use your personal God-given filters -- your eyes and your ears.
Your Responsibility
The other day I decided to skip cooking dinner and ordered fast food, and I ended up finding an insect on it. My husband and I were shocked, grossed out, disappointed, and I do not know what else.
Are You A Work Addict?
Work addiction is very common in our society today, yet it is not one that is not highly recognised.An interesting article in the March edition of The Success Report published by Success Technologies stated:"Of all the addictions receiving attention today (including alcohol, drugs, gambling and food) work addiction is perhaps the least recognised and possibly the most dangerous.
How to Quickly and Easily Deal With Rude People
Where I live there seems to be a a growing population of rude and vulgar people. And no matter how hard I wish for things to change it is not going to happen.
Tempering Temper
I'm almost always a calm and collected person. Or at least I think I am.
Five Steps to Vocational Passion: A Disciplined Plan for Major Mid-life Changes
There's a famous song lyric that asks: "Is that all there is?" Every seven seconds, an American turns 50 years old. So there's a good chance that song is running through some of their heads.
Saying NO to Good Opportunities!
Tracey started her video production company 2 ½ years ago, and after struggling through the start-up phase, she was finally reaping the fruits of her labor. When we talked, it was clear that she was ready to move onward and upward but didn't know how to go about doing it.
Home For The Holidays
In my husband's family, family members send Christmas cards to other family members (parents to children, brothers and sisters to one another, etc.) even though the family always spends time together at Christmas for a meal and gift exchange.
Automatic Brain Works Overtime For You
Use all of your brain to be your most effective."Running on Automatic" is what I call the ability to visualize what you need to have happen.
Key Questions for a Coaching Conversation
There are 2 key skills that coaches need to be truly effective, the ability to listen (often for what is missing rather than what is said) and the ability to ask the right question at the right time.Now in reality there are no 'right' questions, there are however some very good, and fairly generic questions that when asked which can make a significant difference to the way in which a coaching interaction progresses.
Invest Your Inner Wealth
It started out like any other Wednesday - reports to type, telephones to answer, books to balance. When the clock finally struck 4:30 p.
How to Make $100,000 as a Personal Trainer
In the movie, "The Gladiator," Emperor Commodus' rose to power early on because he realized what was most important to the people of Rome. Most would believe influence would be gained by the accumulation of wealth and fame.
4 Steps to Successful Goal-Setting
Successful people have always had clear, focused goals that guide them to greatness.It took Thomas Edison thousands of attempts and thousands of failures over many years to invent the electric light bulb, but he new exactly what he wanted, and his goal kept him going until he achieved it The rest, as they say, is history.